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So, the Joe thing ended with him being like "I guess weapos;ll make things official." Unconvincing, but Iapos;ve chosen to try to think about it as little as possible, which means instead of obsessing 24/7, I take Tuesdays off. I donapos;t know if he really cares, I donapos;t know if he really wants things to work. He keeps talking about the future and I say "We stop fucking as of March, remember? Weapos;re temporarily together, remember? You donapos;t want to sacrifice, remember? Youapos;re afraid of your fucking heart, remember?" Itapos;s always, weapos;ll move to Corvallis and go to OSU, heapos;ll get his business degree, Iapos;ll do whatever. Weapos;ll get bikes and be eco-friendly. Two-point-five kids and barbecues on Fridays. Erlack. No, I will not dream, I will not plan, and I will not be disappointed. I donapos;t plan on anything past March, thatapos;s the end all.

Other than his hot and cold attitude when it comes to me, Joeapos;s pretty close to what I want. Responsible, dependable (god, I love that most about him. Itapos;s great being able to depend on him), good with money, funny, secure in himself, great in bed, heapos;s the whole nine yards, minus the things I liked about the boys before him. Just canapos;t win, can you?

In other news, I canapos;t fucking wait to get off the coast. Iapos;m really tired of this hum-drum bullshit and Iapos;m really disliking my job. Just gotta make it another five months or so, then Iapos;m out and Iapos;m done.
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